Mother Nature
by Phases Of Obsession
Summary: Maureen really hates mother nature, but good thing Joanne is there to make all the PMS evil go away. Pure MoJo fluff.


Joanne is a very light sleeper. Really light. _Extremely_ light. So she knows within seconds when she's in bed alone. It takes her a few minutes to blink out of her post-REM haze, but when she does, she reaches over to the other side of the bed. It's empty, but not cold. Maureen hasn't been up for long.

Joanne swings herself up off of the bed, shuddering when her feet hit the very cold wood floor (which Maureen had dubbed 'the morning ice'). She feels around for her slippers—they're not there. She groans, guessing Maureen had stolen them _again_. She quickly hops across the floor, relaxing when she hits the carpet of the living room.

She hears the soft buzz of the television and, lo and behold, Maureen is curled up on the couch, her eyes glued to the screen, a blanket wrapped around her. She doesn't even notice Joanne standing there. Jo plops down on the sofa with her. She jumps, startled, but then leans over against Joanne, almost in her lap. "I really hate mother nature," she says.

_Ah_, Joanne thinks, and starts playing with Maureen's hair. "That time of the month?"

Maureen nods into her lover's shoulder. "My uterus hates me. Can I just have it taken out? I mean, I'm not going to have kids, so why do I need it for reasons other than my monthly torture?"

Joanne chuckles. "Because it'd screw up your whole system. Trust me, Mo, you're better with it. Have you taken a Midol?"

Maureen shakes her head. "I couldn't find any."

Joanne gets up, smirking. "You are so helpless," she teases, affectionately.

Maureen smiles. "I know. That's why I have you. And for the sex. The sex is amazing."

Rolling her eyes, Joanne walks to the bathroom, reclaiming the slippers on her way, and finds the Midol quickly on the top shelf of the medicine cabinet. She goes back to the living room and tosses them to Maureen. "They were in the medicine cabinet. You looked really hard, didn't you?"

Maureen's face screws up, looking childish and adorable. "We have a medicine cabinet?"

As she's ripping apart the package like some savage, Joanne tells her, "Scoot over." She moves just enough to let Joanne back in. Jo sighs, then turns her attention to the show. She grins. "Aren't you a little bit old for Tom and Jerry?"

Maureen shakes her head, finally freeing the pill that will allow her menstrual freedom. "No. It's quality entertainment."

Joanne shrugs. "Can't argue there. I haven't watched this in _years_…"

"I haven't watched it in two days."

Jo focuses on the blue-ish gray cat. "Why is he so determined to catch a stupid mouse? Do his owners not feed him or something? Also, why does the mouse have to be so arrogant about it? I mean, it's one thing to maybe blow a raspberry once and a while, but it seems like he's just taunting the poor cat. And how is the cat even still alive? Just since I've been sitting here, he's gotten four should-be fatal injuries. How is he not, at the least, unconscious by now?"

"Joanne?"

"Yes?

"It's a cartoon."

"Oh," Joanne says. "Well, still. It should make sense."

Maureen giggles. "You're over-thinking things again, Pookie."

"Sorry," Joanne says, then asks, "Is the meds kicking in yet?"

"They're starting to…You should stay home tomorrow."

Joanne strokes Maureen, once again smirking. "And why is that?"

Now's the part where Mo'll start on her insane Maureen logic. "Well, you have the perfect excuse. Just tell them that the love of your life is currently battling the vicious forces of her killer uterus and that you need to stay home in order to help aid her in the fight."

Yep, good ole' insane Maureen logic, complete with purple prose. Joanne nods. "I'm sure we can work something out."

Maureen looks up, smiling, surprised. "Really?"

"Really."

Maureen kisses Joanne. "You haven't had a day off in forty forevers…it's about time."

With another eye roll, Joanne replies, "It hasn't been _that_ long…Are you about ready to go back to bed?"

Maureen nods and flicks off the TV just as Tom gets hit by yet another frying pan. Joanne follows her, discretely taking in her rather delicious ass. She flies into bed in her Maureen-ish way, while Joanne just slips in like a normal adult. Once under the covers, Maureen snuggles up to Joanne. "Pookie?"

"Yes?"

"I still hate mother nature."

* * *

I hope you enjoyed! Please review!


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